Getting the Healthcare that Thin People Get – And More

I have written a lot about strategies that fat people can use to attempt to overcome their healthcare provider’s weight bias in order to get competent evidence-based care. From cards that can help people have conversations, to lies that may have to be told in order to get necessary care. As always, I want to point out that fatphobia (medical and otherwise) becomes our problem, but it is not our fault and it shouldn’t be happening. We shouldn’t have to gear up for a doctor’s appointment.

I have found that one of the most helpful things to ask a Healthcare Provider when they attempt to prescribe weight loss for a health condition is:

How do you treat this issue in thin people?

I hear from blog readers all the time who were able to use this question to get healthcare beyond the suggestion that they should try to look different (of course it isn’t foolproof, sometimes the HCP is simply unable to get beyond their weight stigma.)

This is good, but there’s actually quite a bit more to it. Getting the care that thin people get isn’t good enough, because that care is created FOR thin people. We deserve more than that. There are so many areas of healthcare that need to be fixed.

Let’s start with medical research. Research is typically done on “average weight” people, without even an attempt to understand how medications or procedures could best be created/used for fat people (despite the fact that we keep hearing about how many fat people are in society.)

Should dosage be increased by weight? Is this pill ineffective after a certain weight (like Plan B which starts to lose effectiveness at 165 pounds and becomes completely ineffective at 176 pounds.) The fact that they don’t even bother to consider fat people in most health research is a serious type of institutionalized oppression. (And, of course, fat people aren’t the only ones – people of color, trans and non-binary people, and women are a few of the groups who aren’t adequately represented in research, those with intersecting marginalizations even more so.)

This one’s a bit graphic, but those responsible for handling cadavers for medical schools won’t bother work with larger bodies, which means that future doctors don’t practice on fat bodies. (Considering that they had no problem flying a fat body 5,000 miles for an exploitative television show it seems like they already know how to solve this.)

Then, of course, there’s the fact that surgeons often tell fat people that they can’t do routine procedures on us because they are “too risky,” then recommend…wait for it…weight loss surgery. Not only is bariatric surgery often more dangerous than the surgery that the fat person actually needs, and not only are those who have had the stomach amputation surgery at additional risk for the surgery that they could have just had in the first place, but the idea that surgery is no problem if you want to mutilate your digestive tract in the hopes of creating a disease state that will force you to starve, but an arthroscopic surgery to fix your knee is just way too risky, would be laughable if it wasn’t being used to harm so many people.

At the absolute least, fat people deserve care that is based on research that includes fat patients, with equipment that was made to work for fat patients, from doctors who were educated on how to work on fat bodies, and are not operating out of weight stigma. It’s really not that much to ask.

Was this helpful? If you appreciate the work that I do, you can support my ability to do more of it with a one-time tip or by becoming a member. (Members get special deals on fat-positive stuff, a monthly e-mail keeping them up to date on the work their membership supports, and the ability to ask me questions that I answer in a members-only monthly Q&A Video!)

Like this blog?  Here’s more stuff you might like:

Wellness for All Bodies Program: A simple, step-by-step, super efficient guide to setting and reaching your health goals from a weight-neutral perspective.  This program can be used by individuals, or by groups, including as a workplace wellness program!

Price: $25.00 ($10 for DancesWithFat members – register on the member page)
Click here for all the details and to register!

Body Love Obstacle Course

This e-course that includes coaching videos, a study guide, and an ebook with the tools you need to create a rock-solid relationship with your body. Our relationships with our bodies don’t happen in a vacuum, so just learning to see our beauty isn’t going to cut it. The world throws obstacles in our way – obstacles that aren’t our fault, but become our problem. Over the course of this program, Ragen Chastain, Jeanette DePatie, and six incredible guest coaches will teach you practical, realistic, proven strategies to go above, around, and through the obstacles that the world puts in front of you when it comes to living an amazing life in the body you have now.
Price: $99.00 Click here to register
($79.00 for DancesWithFat members – register on the member page)

Love It! 234 Inspirations And Activities to Help You Love Your Body
This is filled with thoughtful advice from the authors Jeanette DePatie, Ragen Chastain, and Pia Sciavo-Campo as well as dozens of other notable names from the body love movement, the book is lovingly illustrated with diverse drawings from size-positive artist Toni Tails.
Price: $9.99 softcover, $7.99 Kindle, ($6.95 + free shipping for DancesWithFat Members)

Book Me!  I’d love to speak to your organization. You can get more information here or just e-mail me at ragen at danceswithfat dot org!

I’m (still!) training for an Iron-distance triathlon! You can follow my journey at www.IronFat.com .

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Let’s Play Diet Ad Bingo!

While many of us are spending lots more time at home, I thought it might be a good time to play a little Diet Ad Bingo:

I have become incredibly annoyed with all of the diet ads that I get bombarded with every day (dude, magical weight loss tea is not a “movement’ that people can “join”, what the effing crap.)

Whenever they are online I mark them as “misleading” or, at least, “I don’t want to see this” and hide them.  Unfortunately, plenty of the ads are not deletable – magazines at the grocery store, billboards, even diet ads at the movies now.  So I decided the next best thing to deleting them is making them into a game.

In that spirit, I offer the Diet Ad BINGO card below. You’ll note that “Disclaimer” is the free space because, since they don’t work, they all have some sort of disclaimer/fine print (like “results not even close to typical” or “this diet may kill you.“) As always, people are allowed to diet if they choose (underpants rule!), and people are allowed to poke fun at the diet industry which makes over $60 Billion a year selling a product that is such a failure that they are legally required to say that it doesn’t work every time they advertise it.

Happy BINGO-ing:

Was this helpful? If you appreciate the work that I do, you can support my ability to do more of it with a one-time tip or by becoming a member. (Members get special deals on fat-positive stuff, a monthly e-mail keeping them up to date on the work their membership supports, and the ability to ask me questions that I answer in a members-only monthly Q&A Video!)

Like this blog?  Here’s more stuff you might like:

Wellness for All Bodies Program: A simple, step-by-step, super efficient guide to setting and reaching your health goals from a weight-neutral perspective.  This program can be used by individuals, or by groups, including as a workplace wellness program!

Price: $25.00 ($10 for DancesWithFat members – register on the member page)
Click here for all the details and to register!

Body Love Obstacle Course

This e-course that includes coaching videos, a study guide, and an ebook with the tools you need to create a rock-solid relationship with your body. Our relationships with our bodies don’t happen in a vacuum, so just learning to see our beauty isn’t going to cut it. The world throws obstacles in our way – obstacles that aren’t our fault, but become our problem. Over the course of this program, Ragen Chastain, Jeanette DePatie, and six incredible guest coaches will teach you practical, realistic, proven strategies to go above, around, and through the obstacles that the world puts in front of you when it comes to living an amazing life in the body you have now.
Price: $99.00 Click here to register
($79.00 for DancesWithFat members – register on the member page)

Love It! 234 Inspirations And Activities to Help You Love Your Body
This is filled with thoughtful advice from the authors Jeanette DePatie, Ragen Chastain, and Pia Sciavo-Campo as well as dozens of other notable names from the body love movement, the book is lovingly illustrated with diverse drawings from size-positive artist Toni Tails.
Price: $9.99 softcover, $7.99 Kindle, ($6.95 + free shipping for DancesWithFat Members)

Book Me!  I’d love to speak to your organization. You can get more information here or just e-mail me at ragen at danceswithfat dot org!

I’m (still!) training for an Iron-distance triathlon! You can follow my journey at www.IronFat.com .

If you are uncomfortable with my offering things for sale on this site, you are invited to check out this post.

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Three Cough Drops Are Not A Snack And Other Terrible “Health” Advice

There is so much terrible information being spread about healthcare right now (some coming directly from the “president”) but this mess, found by Beckie H, might take the proverbial cake (Trigger Warning – discussion of food and dieting/disordered eating behaviors)

Here’s the text:

What to do when you’re SICK and want to stay in fat burn

• Most liquid cold/cough syrups tend to be sweetened with sugar
• Chose [sic] a capsule or tablet (pill form) when possible
• Select sugar-free for throat lozenges
• If you need to have liquid medications, you should consider omitting an optional snack–you may need to watch the addition of any condiments–you may want to try selecting vegetables from the lower and/or moderate carbohydrate sections.
• Zycam – no carbs so this will NOT take you out of fat burn
• Hall Cough drops (3 sugar free) = 1 optional snack.
• Robitussin Sugar-Free Peak Cold cough and chest DM has zero calories and zero carbohydrates.
• Dayquil capsules are also calorie-free.
• Mucinex DM is calorie-free
• Alka seltzer Plus Cold Medicine tablet = one condiment.

Ok, first of all, nobody has to give a shit about staying in “fat burn” ever, and especially not when they’re sick (with a reminder that it’s a near-certainty that they’ll gain all their weight back in a few years anyway so they might as well have that cold medicine.)

There are legitimate reasons to care about some of these things (for example, if someone is dealing with blood sugar issues.) But most of these are ridiculous under any guise. The idea that three sugar-free halls equals an “optional snack” means that the snack was going to be something like a half teaspoon of peanut butter. In what world is 1/2 a teaspoon of peanut butter “optional?” If you’re measuring your food down to the 1/2 teaspoon, none of it should be optional – you’re going to need every last bit of it (which is why this kind of behavior can be so destructive to our relationship with food.) Plus, if your snack was food, it would have some nutritional content  – vitamins, minerals, fiber, protein, fat, carbs etc. – whereas three sugar-free halls just have the ability to suppress coughs – an important thing to be sure, but not life-giving. So this is not a reasonable exchange under any circumstances.

The Alka seltzer exchange is equally ridiculous – it only works if your condiment was the equivalent of 1 teaspoon of mustard. If your diet hinges on a teaspoon of mustard, I would advise you to ask some questions as to their long-term success rates (I’d advise this under any circumstances but, I mean, a teaspoon of mustard? Come on.)

Diet advice is essentially completely useless at any time, but when we add diet advice to a time when we’re dealing with other stressors like illness or, say, being stuck at home during a global pandemic, things can get out of hand, people can be misinformed, eating disorders can get triggered, and health can suffer.

Extracting myself from diet culture wasn’t easy, but it has absolutely been worth it in so many ways, many of which are being highlighted now as I’m able to focus on getting through this difficult time, rather than worrying about manipulating my body size.

My heart goes out to everyone who is dealing with diet culture, disordered eating, and eating disorders during this rough time. We can do our part to help by not spreading diet culture crap, and calling it out as dangerous when we see it.

Was this helpful? If you appreciate the work that I do, you can support my ability to do more of it with a one-time tip or by becoming a member. (Members get special deals on fat-positive stuff, a monthly e-mail keeping them up to date on the work their membership supports, and the ability to ask me questions that I answer in a members-only monthly Q&A Video!)

Like this blog?  Here’s more stuff you might like:

Wellness for All Bodies Program: A simple, step-by-step, super efficient guide to setting and reaching your health goals from a weight-neutral perspective.  This program can be used by individuals, or by groups, including as a workplace wellness program!

Price: $25.00 ($10 for DancesWithFat members – register on the member page)
Click here for all the details and to register!

Body Love Obstacle Course

This e-course that includes coaching videos, a study guide, and an ebook with the tools you need to create a rock-solid relationship with your body. Our relationships with our bodies don’t happen in a vacuum, so just learning to see our beauty isn’t going to cut it. The world throws obstacles in our way – obstacles that aren’t our fault, but become our problem. Over the course of this program, Ragen Chastain, Jeanette DePatie, and six incredible guest coaches will teach you practical, realistic, proven strategies to go above, around, and through the obstacles that the world puts in front of you when it comes to living an amazing life in the body you have now.
Price: $99.00 Click here to register
($79.00 for DancesWithFat members – register on the member page)

Love It! 234 Inspirations And Activities to Help You Love Your Body
This is filled with thoughtful advice from the authors Jeanette DePatie, Ragen Chastain, and Pia Sciavo-Campo as well as dozens of other notable names from the body love movement, the book is lovingly illustrated with diverse drawings from size-positive artist Toni Tails.
Price: $9.99 softcover, $7.99 Kindle, ($6.95 + free shipping for DancesWithFat Members)

Book Me!  I’d love to speak to your organization. You can get more information here or just e-mail me at ragen at danceswithfat dot org!

I’m (still!) training for an Iron-distance triathlon! You can follow my journey at www.IronFat.com .

If you are uncomfortable with my offering things for sale on this site, you are invited to check out this post.

 

via Dances With Fat https://ift.tt/3dqd78z

The “I Dieted Successfully, So You Can Too” Mistake

I was recently part of a discussion about weight loss online. I was pointing out the research about intentional weight loss methods – and the fact that what the research shows is that most people can lose weight short term, but almost everyone gains it back long-term with most gaining back more than they lost. Someone immediately jumped in and said “I lost weight and kept it off, so what about that. Anyone can do it if they try hard enough.”

I see this a lot in these types of discussions. Hell, the National Weight Control Registry is literally built on this mistake (by people who should know better, but there seems to be more profit in acting like they don’t.)

The careful reader will note that in the original conversation I said “almost everyone” gains the weight back. The term here is “outlier,” someone whose experience/outcome is far different than what is typical.  The existence of outliers cannot be used to prove that the outcome they experienced could have/can be achieved by others.

So the fact that a tiny percentage of people don’t regain all their weight does not indicate that everyone can have the same outcome. There are people whose parachutes don’t open but they survive. That doesn’t make it reasonable for them to insist that their experience proves that anyone can survive their chute not opening if they just try hard enough.

That’s ludicrous. And yet every time we state the facts about the failure rates of intentional weight loss attempts, here comes someone who wants to talk about how their aunt’s best friend’s babysitter’s mom did it, like that cancels out a mountain of evidence.

When it comes to maintaining significant weight loss there are a number of factors that may contribute. A couple common examples:

It’s possible that they haven’t gained their weight back…yet. Most people gain their weight back in 2-5 years (which is why so many of the people you see on diet commercials are within that time frame.) This is the one I see most often. When challenged, I find that many of these people think that saying “I’m definitely not gaining it back” is someone evidence of their future purported success. Spoiler alert – it is not.

It’s possible that they developed disordered eating/an eating disorder (which wouldn’t be surprising since many diets encourage the exact same behaviors that people dealing with eating disorders struggle to stop.) This is a worst-case scenario since they are likely to be congratulated and supported for their dangerous eating disorder behaviors, and terrified to regain their weight because of the positive reaction they are receiving.

Regardless, if “trying hard” to be thin would make us thin, every fat person I know would be thin. The truth is that almost everyone who attempts weight loss will lose weight short term but gain it all back longterm, with many gaining back more than they lost. This means that the vast majority of people who commit to dieting will waste time, money, and energy in a futile – sometimes dangerous – pursuit.  Alternately, we could get off the diet roller coaster and never, ever get back on.

Was this helpful? If you appreciate the work that I do, you can support my ability to do more of it with a one-time tip or by becoming a member. (Members get special deals on fat-positive stuff, a monthly e-mail keeping them up to date on the work their membership supports, and the ability to ask me questions that I answer in a members-only monthly Q&A Video!)

Like this blog?  Here’s more stuff you might like:

Wellness for All Bodies Program: A simple, step-by-step, super efficient guide to setting and reaching your health goals from a weight-neutral perspective.  This program can be used by individuals, or by groups, including as a workplace wellness program!

Price: $25.00 ($10 for DancesWithFat members – register on the member page)
Click here for all the details and to register!

Body Love Obstacle Course

This e-course that includes coaching videos, a study guide, and an ebook with the tools you need to create a rock-solid relationship with your body. Our relationships with our bodies don’t happen in a vacuum, so just learning to see our beauty isn’t going to cut it. The world throws obstacles in our way – obstacles that aren’t our fault, but become our problem. Over the course of this program, Ragen Chastain, Jeanette DePatie, and six incredible guest coaches will teach you practical, realistic, proven strategies to go above, around, and through the obstacles that the world puts in front of you when it comes to living an amazing life in the body you have now.
Price: $99.00 Click here to register
($79.00 for DancesWithFat members – register on the member page)

Love It! 234 Inspirations And Activities to Help You Love Your Body
This is filled with thoughtful advice from the authors Jeanette DePatie, Ragen Chastain, and Pia Sciavo-Campo as well as dozens of other notable names from the body love movement, the book is lovingly illustrated with diverse drawings from size-positive artist Toni Tails.
Price: $9.99 softcover, $7.99 Kindle, ($6.95 + free shipping for DancesWithFat Members)

Book Me!  I’d love to speak to your organization. You can get more information here or just e-mail me at ragen at danceswithfat dot org!

I’m (still!) training for an Iron-distance triathlon! You can follow my journey at www.IronFat.com .

If you are uncomfortable with my offering things for sale on this site, you are invited to check out this post.

via Dances With Fat https://ift.tt/2wyhP3B

These Coronavirus Weight-Gain Memes Need To Stop Right F*cking Now

Greetings from social isolation, I hope that everyone reading this is doing as well as possible as we navigate this together. We’re in the middle of a global pandemic, so of course, people are using this opportunity to perpetuate fatphobic bullshit.

To be clear, there are serious conversations online about people fearing weight gain during social isolation, which is in itself indicative of the issues in a society that is built on weight stigma and diet culture. The worst of it, to me, are the memes. Because the memes are seen as “jokes” which means that they get shared and people get defensive about it when we point out that they are harmful, and go into that whole “why can’t you take a joke” bullshit. (Hint – it’s not that I can’t “take a joke” made at my expense that harms me, it’s that I shouldn’t have to.)

Of course people are arguing that this isn’t fatphobic, which is patently ridiculous. These memes are absolutely fatphobic because anything that suggests that a fatter body is a negative outcome is fatphobic. Anything that puts fat bodies in a negative light is fatphobic. This is not, in any way, complicated. And there is never any justification for fat-shaming.

But it’s not just the fatphobia – though that would be bad enough to demand that it stop. These are also harmful to people of all sizes who are dealing with disordered eating/eating disorders/body dysmorphia while dealing with quarantine – in a time when they are often cut off from their typical support and resources, memes like this reinforce a fear of body size change due to eating.

There is plenty of humor to be had without doing harm to other people. If someone can’t manage to find it, then maybe humor is just not for them. Definitely don’t share this bullshit and, if you’re up for it, consider saying something when you see them posted,

You can confront directly, or try something a little softer, like “I didn’t realize it, but memes like this actually contribute to eating disorders and weight stigma, so I wanted to pass that along” and/or you can copy this blog post if you think it will be helpful.

Was this helpful? If you appreciate the work that I do, you can support my ability to do more of it with a one-time tip or by becoming a member. (Members get special deals on fat-positive stuff, a monthly e-mail keeping them up to date on the work their membership supports, and the ability to ask me questions that I answer in a members-only monthly Q&A Video!)

Like this blog?  Here’s more stuff you might like:

Wellness for All Bodies Program: A simple, step-by-step, super efficient guide to setting and reaching your health goals from a weight-neutral perspective.  This program can be used by individuals, or by groups, including as a workplace wellness program!

Price: $25.00 ($10 for DancesWithFat members – register on the member page)
Click here for all the details and to register!

Body Love Obstacle Course

This e-course that includes coaching videos, a study guide, and an ebook with the tools you need to create a rock-solid relationship with your body. Our relationships with our bodies don’t happen in a vacuum, so just learning to see our beauty isn’t going to cut it. The world throws obstacles in our way – obstacles that aren’t our fault, but become our problem. Over the course of this program, Ragen Chastain, Jeanette DePatie, and six incredible guest coaches will teach you practical, realistic, proven strategies to go above, around, and through the obstacles that the world puts in front of you when it comes to living an amazing life in the body you have now.
Price: $99.00 Click here to register
($79.00 for DancesWithFat members – register on the member page)

Love It! 234 Inspirations And Activities to Help You Love Your Body
This is filled with thoughtful advice from the authors Jeanette DePatie, Ragen Chastain, and Pia Sciavo-Campo as well as dozens of other notable names from the body love movement, the book is lovingly illustrated with diverse drawings from size-positive artist Toni Tails.
Price: $9.99 softcover, $7.99 Kindle, ($6.95 + free shipping for DancesWithFat Members)

Book Me!  I’d love to speak to your organization. You can get more information here or just e-mail me at ragen at danceswithfat dot org!

I’m (still!) training for an Iron-distance triathlon! You can follow my journey at www.IronFat.com .

If you are uncomfortable with my offering things for sale on this site, you are invited to check out this post.

via Dances With Fat https://ift.tt/2U8THxB

Back On The Treadmill

Got back on the treadmill today. (Actual for-exercise home treadmill, not a job.) I started this a while ago, but the last 2 weeks my schedule has been a bit off.

I don’t do much, because I can’t. The shortness of breath persisted way past the rest of my recovery from the pulmonary embolism.

I walk about five minutes at 0.8 or 0.9 or 1 mph to The Hidden Almanac podcast. Not long!

Yet.

My resting pulse has dropped below 100.

My blood pressure is dropping.

The leveled treadmill with support rails on both sides lets my knees & hips walk in the most neutral position so that they can relearn good habits.

Yes, I’d like to be able to walk further. But this is what I can do now, so it’s what I’m doing now.

via Living ~400lbs https://ift.tt/2J3ru4R

Medical Fatphobia – The Ob/Gyn Should Not Be A BYOS (Bring Your Own Speculum) Party

I talk a lot about medical fatphobia (because medical fatphobia literally kills fat people,) and I’ve now heard from several super fat people who went for their annual visit to the gynecologist only to be told that the gynecologist doesn’t have the proper size speculum. In most cases, the person was just told outright that they couldn’t be helped (prompting them to e-mail me to see if I knew of any options.) But in one case the patient was told that specula that would work existed, and that if the patient wanted to buy one (the doctor suggested Amazon.com) they could bring it in for an exam. Then the doctor refused to refund their co-pay, since they “shouldn’t have expected” that they could be accommodated. With a speculum. At the gynecologist. For a pre-scheduled pap smear.

This is such blatant and disgusting fatphobia that I can hardly put my rage into words. It’s not just specula – thought that feels like a particularly awful aberration since going to the gynecologist is such a stressful situation to begin with, and putting off the visit can mean missing/postponing a cancer diagnosis. But it’s also blood pressure cuffs, knee braces, higher weight capacity beds and chairs, longer needles for vaccinations and other procedures, and on and on and on.

In some cases the needed medical equipment doesn’t exist – larger size knee braces, for example, may need to be custom made. And that’ s completely unacceptable since it is a known fact that fat people do both exist, and have knees.

But in many cases, the items absolutely exist but the healthcare facility has simply chosen not to bother to provide competent care to fat patients. This is, obviously, inconsistent with any belief in “doing no harm” or anything resembling a community health practice.

Plenty of fat patients have been forced to participate in humiliating weigh-ins under the guise of it being “medically necessary” (spoiler alert: It’s almost never medically necessary) only to find that their healthcare practitioner cant’ even take a correct blood pressure because they haven’t bothered to spring for the properly sized cuff (which I found for $30 online from a medical supply company, and $12 on ebay.)

Size discrimination by medical facilities should not be allowed. Patients of all sizes should be able to sit and lie down as necessary for the care. They should be able to get an accurate blood pressure reading – something that is as basic as basic gets when it comes to medical care. Not bothering to have appropriately sized needles shouldn’t be a barrier to vaccination. A visit to the gynecologist should not be a BYOS party.

I don’t want to hear another damn word about how fat people have poorer health outcomes until fat people have equal access to competent, stigma-free care (and of course this is compounded for those who are subject to other oppression and bigotry in healthcare including racism, transphobia, homophobia, and misogyny.)

Fat patients deserve the same care that thinner patients get, there is absolutely no justification for anything less.

Was this helpful? If you appreciate the work that I do, you can support my ability to do more of it with a one-time tip or by becoming a member. (Members get special deals on fat-positive stuff, a monthly e-mail keeping them up to date on the work their membership supports, and the ability to ask me questions that I answer in a members-only monthly Q&A Video!)

Like this blog?  Here’s more stuff you might like:

Wellness for All Bodies Program: A simple, step-by-step, super efficient guide to setting and reaching your health goals from a weight-neutral perspective.  This program can be used by individuals, or by groups, including as a workplace wellness program!

Price: $25.00 ($10 for DancesWithFat members – register on the member page)
Click here for all the details and to register!

Body Love Obstacle Course

This e-course that includes coaching videos, a study guide, and an ebook with the tools you need to create a rock-solid relationship with your body. Our relationships with our bodies don’t happen in a vacuum, so just learning to see our beauty isn’t going to cut it. The world throws obstacles in our way – obstacles that aren’t our fault, but become our problem. Over the course of this program, Ragen Chastain, Jeanette DePatie, and six incredible guest coaches will teach you practical, realistic, proven strategies to go above, around, and through the obstacles that the world puts in front of you when it comes to living an amazing life in the body you have now.
Price: $99.00 Click here to register
($79.00 for DancesWithFat members – register on the member page)

Love It! 234 Inspirations And Activities to Help You Love Your Body
This is filled with thoughtful advice from the authors Jeanette DePatie, Ragen Chastain, and Pia Sciavo-Campo as well as dozens of other notable names from the body love movement, the book is lovingly illustrated with diverse drawings from size-positive artist Toni Tails.
Price: $9.99 softcover, $7.99 Kindle, ($6.95 + free shipping for DancesWithFat Members)

Book Me!  I’d love to speak to your organization. You can get more information here or just e-mail me at ragen at danceswithfat dot org!

I’m (still!) training for an Iron-distance triathlon! You can follow my journey at www.IronFat.com .

If you are uncomfortable with my offering things for sale on this site, you are invited to check out this post.

 

via Dances With Fat https://ift.tt/2QrZlIT

Sláinte! From Me to You in This Difficult Time

Monday would have been my grandma’s 100th birthday had she lived to see it. I have been thinking about her so much these last few weeks. She was a Registered Nurse, served in the Army in WWII, and during my lifetime she worked in a convalescent hospital. I cannot help but wonder what she would do during this Pandemic, but then I know the thought of that human turd in office may have killed her anyway. She hated Republicans, though she was a Catholic, she was of the type so pure of heart that when faced with only her glare no man would stand a chance against her. Petite in stature, big in humor and heart, I can’t say that she raised me, but was a constant beacon in the darkness of my life back when. Monday evening 6 SF bay area counties (where I live) were ordered to shelter in place, likely until April 7th.

The day after her birthday, was St. Patrick’s day. I didn’t even wear green! I was home the whole day, kept seeing green things and celebrations online, but I didn’t even bother to listen to her/my favorite Irish rebel music. So this morning, in my dimly lit living room, a bit more chilly than I’d like to be, I realized my folly and instructed aloud, “Alexa, play the Clancy Brothers, Live at Carnegie Hall” and she responds, “Playing, In Person at Carnegie Hall, 1963, the Clancy Brothers with Tommy Makem” and then I hear it begin and it’s like my grandma and her sister are still here. I can hear their laughter, the clink of a glass, “Sláinte!” shouted briskly. Only they’re gone and it’s only me singing along to “Juice of the Barley” and “Jug of Punch”, the latter being my all-time favorite and never ceases to bring out every last Irish cell in my body to sing and to weep. It is a warming and aching thing to have an Irish heart.  As much as it can swell with love or pride, it will always have the ache of our ancestors too.

Self-isolating isn’t difficult for me at all. I have been relishing my single life and living alone life for over a year now and seeing everyone else at home too makes me feel part of a community in a way. My biggest struggle was getting my groceries. Grocery stores are a big trigger for my C-PTSD on the best day, but with all of the reports of outages and fights and this looming contagion to deal with I know that would be a recipe for a massive panic attack. I have a recurring local grocery delivery every Friday evening, but last Friday I waited through my delivery window until far outside my usual allotment of patience I emailed them and they had rescheduled it for Tuesday. No warning or communication what so ever. Ugh! So that weekend I had to get. bit creative with what I had on hand. Luckily I had taken home about 2 meals with worth of leftovers from work. When they finally were delivered last night I nearly cried from relief!

I grew up with food insecurity. My family was poor and always stretched too thin. I remember a doctor telling my parents when I was about 7 or 8 years old that I was malnourished. They put me on protein shakes that I can smell (and gag from even thinking about) to this very day! I remember being 4 and 5 years old and asking when we could have dinner and it was always later on Friday nights because it was my dad’s payday and since he worked at Gemco (they had a full grocery store inside, similar to Target now but old school) he would cash his check and bring home some groceries. This past weekend brought a lot of those feelings back to me. Those itchy, anxious feelings, not even like hunger or pain. Just the anxiety times eleven!

Once I put everything away in my small-ass apartment fridge (seriously why is it so small?!) I closed it and opened it again like three times. Just to be sure! It was there and it was real. And every time I opened it I would smile and look at my doggo with pride. He didn’t care, he just wanted all the food. Ha-ha! The last time I opened it to check I laughed at myself and finally went to bed. I slept so much better too!

I know that my grandma would be very proud of me and all that I have accomplished since she passed away in October 2003. I’ve had many careers and opened my own cafe since then. Gosh she would have loved my cafe! Sure she missed my first wedding (heavy assumption there, I don’t even think I’d want a second! Ha!), but that cafe was all me, ya know? I can hear her saying my name, “Oh Sarah!” and her tight hugs. Her petite frame was also misleading, she was tough as nails! Being a nurse all those years, she was strong as hell and could probably take down The Rock! Just sayin’! Her sister was no different, though perhaps a bit more straight forward and brusque than my grandma. They were nearly two-sides of the same coin it seemed. Their mother was from Ireland, though the two sisters were born in Connecticut, I believe. I think often of all they had seen during their lifetimes. The world has changed many times over since they were born, and died, really.

As we are all looking towards our unknowable futures, I think it’s valuable to stay connected to your ancestry and cultures in ways that are fulfilling. I don’t have the items needed to make Irish Soda Bread at the moment, but I do remember the last time my grandma shared some with us that she’d bought at Safeway, and how disgusted she was with their chain-store version, as we all slathered it with butter and jam. Ha-ha! I used to make it every year but have not been wanting to bake for a few years now. Or rather, I will want to but often don’t have the energy. I think I will make some as soon as this shelter in place guideline is lifted. Something to look forward to, certainly. I’m very picky about what goes into my soda bread, just as my grandma was. Whole caraway seeds and black currants, never raisins! Unfortunately I have also been a bit of a disappointment to my great-aunt as I cannot stomach any sort of whiskey, not even her beloved Bushmills. Though she did teach me to make a proper vodka tonic…so proper it’ll knock your socks off with your shoes still on! Ha-ha!

With the extra time that working from home allows I have gathered together some of my poetry into a collection with a theme. At first I thought it would be a chapbook, as that’s been on my bucket list for awhile. Once I put them together though I soon realized I had much more than I thought. So a collection it is! Now to look into getting it printed somehow. Not exactly something I’m trying to publish in a big way or get famous for (As if! Ha-ha!), but more just to do it and to have it and to share with interested parties, ya know? I wanted to add my own doodles throughout but I’ll be damned if I can’t even think of a single image. I don’t particularly enjoy drawing anyway but every now and then I can pull something off. Oh well. If you’re a doodler/artist with an open and kind heart, perhaps we might work together? I can pay and wouldn’t require much time for this and it isn’t a profit driven project but a personal one (and quite vulnerable for me). Please reach out if interested, though! I also want to try my hand at this crochet skull shawl, not sure I have enough yarn but it’s been so long since I’ve done any hooking that I will simply enjoy playing with yarn again.

I have been enjoying Cinder Ernst’s daily quick 5 minute exercise/strengthening videos. Check them out here! and seriously join the group it’s very positive and uplifting and not at all corny or shaming in any way! Doing them today and yesterday really lifted my spirits. I found myself trying to incorporate some of the moves just throughout my day. Check out her new book, “plus size knee pain solutions” as well! Cinder has been working with/in fat community in the SF Bay area for many years and is a pleasure and a joy to work with and know. She presented/performed at both of my Fatty Affair events years ago.

What things have you been trying to break up the day? To keep you sane? What are you struggling with? I really do believe that we are all in this together and only need to lean on each other to get through. I have seen a lot of posts on social media about meditation, yoga, and simple breathing exercises to stay calm/grounded. I haven’t left the house since I got home on Monday, but once the rain lets up I plan to do some gardening. This is the first time in my life I’m looking forward to gardening and spring and all of that! I might have to get proper gardening gloves at some point. Ha-ha! I have held off any online ordering for the time being, no point in it until I can actually use it. I want to try to do tomatoes and strawberries in vertical pockets along my back fence. I’m nervously excited to try it, anyway. At least it’s not a very expensive hobby and may produce food in the end, we’ll see!

If you are struggling with isolation please reach out to someone. Even me! notblueatall@notblueatall.com! There is no need to suffer alone and in silence. My friends have been checking in through text and sending funny gifs to each other. Some have started writing postcards and letters through snail mail! I love that! Whatever works for you is awesome! I love seeing ideas and things for this purpose shared everywhere. A lot of people have been cooking and sharing recipes. I love it all! Just know that you aren’t alone and you will get through this. For me this is comfortable, but heavy socializing drains me. I joked with a fellow introvert about how we need downtime to reenergize after socializing and all this isolation will make us all too powerful ad we’ll take over the world. Don’t worry, it will be a peaceful takeover. Lots of tea and books. Ha-ha!

***

I’m here for realness and sincerity, honesty and vulnerability, I’m here for the good and juicy bits of life that shine for me when I know I’m heading in the right direction.

Rad Fatty Love to ALL,

<3
S

P.S. Check out and use the hashtag: #FatAndFree on Instagram & Facebook!

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Fat Positive Children’s Books

I started this post a while ago, but it seems extra pertinent now that more kids are hanging out at home reading!

Recently Glamour ran an article titled “The First Body-Positive Children’s Book Just Came Out, and It’s Exactly What the World Needs Now” Before we get to our discussion of books, there are some things we need to talk about.

For starters, this is not remotely the “first body-positive” children’s book. Claiming that this book is the first of its kind (and to be clear, I don’t know if that was the author’s decision, the writer’s, or the editor’s) is an act of erasure and it’s a big deal.

There have been books trying to help kids love their bodies for a long time. Very few of them include body size, but if you search for “body-positive children’s books” you’ll find many, many books written to help kids overcome the body shame they experience because of marginalizations including racism, xenophobia, and ableism as well as things like height.

If you are looking for fat-positive children’s books the list becomes quite a bit smaller (and some of the books that were meant to be size positive are pretty terrible – using terms like “overweight” that pathologize kid’s bodies, books that are supposed to be about developing a healthy relationship with food but instead moralize food in ways that we know to perpetuate eating disorders, ) but still, this book is far from the first.

The first that came to mind for me was Sonya Renee Taylor’s Celebrate Your Body (and Its Changes, Too!): The Ultimate Puberty Book for Girls

And Amy Pence-Brown wrote a great article about this that you can find here.

Three Birds Counseling also has a fabulous list

Kids books are a bit outside of my wheelhouse so I crowdsourced answers and you can find that thread on Facebook here:

https://www.facebook.com/ragenchastain/posts/10219779923439843

I definitely recommend that you vet any of these books before giving them to kids in your life. I also want to acknowledge that not all books do a good job of being inclusive of kids of color, queer and trans kids, disabled kids, neuroatypical kids and other intersectional marginalizations.

If you have a favorite fat positive children’s book, please leave it in the comments!

Was this helpful? If you appreciate the work that I do, you can support my ability to do more of it with a one-time tip or by becoming a member. (Members get special deals on fat-positive stuff, a monthly e-mail keeping them up to date on the work their membership supports, and the ability to ask me questions that I answer in a members-only monthly Q&A Video!)

Like this blog?  Here’s more stuff you might like:

Wellness for All Bodies Program: A simple, step-by-step, super efficient guide to setting and reaching your health goals from a weight-neutral perspective.  This program can be used by individuals, or by groups, including as a workplace wellness program!

Price: $25.00 ($10 for DancesWithFat members – register on the member page)
Click here for all the details and to register!

Body Love Obstacle Course

This e-course that includes coaching videos, a study guide, and an ebook with the tools you need to create a rock-solid relationship with your body. Our relationships with our bodies don’t happen in a vacuum, so just learning to see our beauty isn’t going to cut it. The world throws obstacles in our way – obstacles that aren’t our fault, but become our problem. Over the course of this program, Ragen Chastain, Jeanette DePatie, and six incredible guest coaches will teach you practical, realistic, proven strategies to go above, around, and through the obstacles that the world puts in front of you when it comes to living an amazing life in the body you have now.
Price: $99.00 Click here to register
($79.00 for DancesWithFat members – register on the member page)

Love It! 234 Inspirations And Activities to Help You Love Your Body
This is filled with thoughtful advice from the authors Jeanette DePatie, Ragen Chastain, and Pia Sciavo-Campo as well as dozens of other notable names from the body love movement, the book is lovingly illustrated with diverse drawings from size-positive artist Toni Tails.
Price: $9.99 softcover, $7.99 Kindle, ($6.95 + free shipping for DancesWithFat Members)

Book Me!  I’d love to speak to your organization. You can get more information here or just e-mail me at ragen at danceswithfat dot org!

I’m (still!) training for an Iron-distance triathlon! You can follow my journey at www.IronFat.com .

If you are uncomfortable with my offering things for sale on this site, you are invited to check out this post.

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Is “Ob*sity” a Risk Factor For Coronavirus (COVID-19)?

I want to start by saying that I’m not trying to give anyone advice on how to handle the current pandemic. I am personally taking as many precautions as possible. I also want to acknowledge that our choices as to how to handle this are all affected by our privilege and that the most marginalized people face the most harm.

A question that I am getting A LOT recently is “I’m hearing that “ob*sity” is a risk factor for contracting COVID-19 – is that true?”

I’ll start here by saying that I think the biggest concern is medical fatphobia – that fat people will not be able to access the same care as similarly situated thin people.

I also want to point out that the word “ob*sity” was created for the sole purpose of pathologizing a body size and it is not a word that I think is appropriate to use in any context (for the reasons below and more) and I’m only using it here because it’s what’s used in the lexicon and it’s (mis)use is part of the issue.)

When it comes to risk factors, correlation is not causation and weight stigma within the medical field, including in practice and research, is well established and so must be considered when considering any “data” that involves weight/BMI.

“Ob*sity” is the result of a math equation (weight in pounds time 703 divided by height in inches squared is greater than or equal to 30) By the “logic” here I’m at greater risk along with a good portion of the NFL and a whole lot of bodybuilders, so unless all of us have been shown to be at greater risk, this is a very questionable statement of risk.

Even if they are trying to talk about actual presence of adipose tissue, there would have to be data that showed that the actual presence of adipose tissue increased risk – and if that were the case “ob*sity” would be the incorrect word to use since BMI does not, in any way, measure body composition.

So-called “ob*se” people don’t have anything in common except a height/weight ratio.  This group has that as much diversity as any group of people who happen to share a single physical characteristic.

In fact, the things that this group is most likely to share are experiencing weight stigma, and a lifetime of dieting/weight-cycling. Both of those are also correlated with the same health issues that are commonly correlated with having a larger body, and neither of which are ever controlled for in studies about health outcomes making these confounding variables.

Bottom line: conflating “ob*sity” with health/risk status is not an evidence-based practice and while it may not be a negative outcome for fat people to take extra precautions, it can create direct harm, including when blaming fat people for our health issues creates barriers to healthcare access.

Was this helpful? If you appreciate the work that I do, you can support my ability to do more of it with a one-time tip or by becoming a member. (Members get special deals on fat-positive stuff, a monthly e-mail keeping them up to date on the work their membership supports, and the ability to ask me questions that I answer in a members-only monthly Q&A Video!)

Like this blog?  Here’s more stuff you might like:

Wellness for All Bodies Program: A simple, step-by-step, super efficient guide to setting and reaching your health goals from a weight-neutral perspective.  This program can be used by individuals, or by groups, including as a workplace wellness program!

Price: $25.00 ($10 for DancesWithFat members – register on the member page)
Click here for all the details and to register!

Body Love Obstacle Course

This e-course that includes coaching videos, a study guide, and an ebook with the tools you need to create a rock-solid relationship with your body. Our relationships with our bodies don’t happen in a vacuum, so just learning to see our beauty isn’t going to cut it. The world throws obstacles in our way – obstacles that aren’t our fault, but become our problem. Over the course of this program, Ragen Chastain, Jeanette DePatie, and six incredible guest coaches will teach you practical, realistic, proven strategies to go above, around, and through the obstacles that the world puts in front of you when it comes to living an amazing life in the body you have now.
Price: $99.00 Click here to register
($79.00 for DancesWithFat members – register on the member page)

Love It! 234 Inspirations And Activities to Help You Love Your Body
This is filled with thoughtful advice from the authors Jeanette DePatie, Ragen Chastain, and Pia Sciavo-Campo as well as dozens of other notable names from the body love movement, the book is lovingly illustrated with diverse drawings from size-positive artist Toni Tails.
Price: $9.99 softcover, $7.99 Kindle, ($6.95 + free shipping for DancesWithFat Members)

Book Me!  I’d love to speak to your organization. You can get more information here or just e-mail me at ragen at danceswithfat dot org!

I’m (still!) training for an Iron-distance triathlon! You can follow my journey at www.IronFat.com .

If you are uncomfortable with my offering things for sale on this site, you are invited to check out this post.

 

 

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Dealing With Fatphobia – How To Practice Putting The Problem Where It Belongs

Fatphobia, weight stigma, and weight-based oppression are not in our heads – they are real and fat people experience them constantly in everything from fashion, to travel, to the working out, to medical care and more.  The more fat we are, the more oppression we experience and things are even worse for those who are part of multiple marginalized groups.

One of the things that we can do to combat this is to make sure that we’re always putting the problem where it belongs – which is on fatphobia and not on our fat bodies. This is a skill that can take some practice, especially since internalized fatphobia can often make blaming our bodies a nearly automatic subconscious response to experiencing fatphobia. here is a three-step approach to shifting things to make sure you are putting the problem where it belongs.

Step One:

Acknowledge the Fatphobia (or weight stigma, or whatever word works for you – I’m using fatphobia in general here to mean any situation in which fat people cannot expect to receive the same treatment, accommodations as thin people)

Step Two:

State What’s Happening, Putting The Blame Where It Belongs (on fatphobia, not your body)

Step Three:

Choose Next Steps

Let’s look at some examples:

You want to go on a trip but you realize that the size of the plane seats means you’ll need two seats.

Step One:

This is fatphobia. The airline industry is extremely fatphobic.

Step Two:

They knew fat people existed when the built the planes and yet they choose not to accommodate us. The airline sells travel from point A to point B, and that travel requires a seat that accommodates the passenger. I only want what thin people are already getting which is travel from place to place in a seat that fits me.

Step Three:

Consider the alternatives, perhaps you can fly Southwest (the only airline who gives passengers as many seats as they need.) Perhaps you can go by train or car or another method of transportation. You may choose to buy the second seat. You may choose to contact the airline and complain. Whatever you decide is a valid choice. While this has become your problem it is definitely not your fault.

Your doctor ignores your symptoms, doesn’t listen to anything you say, and just keeps pushing weight loss

Step One:

“This is fatphobia. Weight stigma is rampant in the medical community.”

Step Two:

I deserve compassionate, evidence-based care. This isn’t it. Weight loss isn’t evidence-based medicine, and the most likely outcome is weight gain. This doctor is committing malpractice and putting me in danger.

Step Three:

You might decide to try another doctor. You might ask this doctor to respect your wishes as the patient and/or discuss the evidence basis of his claims (I’ve created some free cards to help you to that, they are currently available in English and French) You might ask your doctor what they would prescribe to a thin patient with your health issues.  If you are in a situation where that’s not possible you might lie to your doctor and tell him that you’ll attempt weight loss, then ask him to please address your health issues with the other available options in the meantime. Again, whatever you decide is valid, you should never have been put into this situation in the first place.

Your friend or family member makes a negative comment about your body/suggests that you should lose weight etc.

Step One:
This is fatphobia – in a fatphobic society, these comments are seen as acceptable.

Step Two:
The person talking to me has been duped by fatphobia and they are visiting their bigotry on me. I don’t have to agree with them, center their feelings, or be ok with them talking to me like this.

Step Three:
Your response here will take a lot into account, including the way that your family/friendship works, if you are relying on this person etc. I wrote a post giving some simple steps for boundary setting and some sample response, you can find that here.

You are sitting on a chair and it breaks

Step One:

This is fatphobia, I should be able to expect chairs to work for me in the same way they work for thin people.

Step Two:

It sucks that this place didn’t want to bother to get chairs that actually accommodate everyone.

Step Three:

This one can be rough because the urge to self-blame can be so strong. You can say something like “Shoddy ass chairs” in whatever tone you like (angry, laughing etc.) You can decide to leave, you can loudly asked for a better-constructed chair. You can leave. You can ask the people with you to advocate for you. And remember that you have every right to be upset, because this situation is upsetting, but you didn’t do anything wrong.

Fatphobia is not our fault, though it very often becomes our problem. Reminding ourselves that fatphobia, and not our bodies, is the problem can help us to handle these situations in ways that honor our bodies and keep us in the best possible mental space.

If you have other scenarios please feel free to leave them in the comments.

Was this helpful? If you appreciate the work that I do, you can support my ability to do more of it with a one-time tip or by becoming a member. (Members get special deals on fat-positive stuff, a monthly e-mail keeping them up to date on the work their membership supports, and the ability to ask me questions that I answer in a members-only monthly Q&A Video!)

Like this blog?  Here’s more stuff you might like:

Wellness for All Bodies Program: A simple, step-by-step, super efficient guide to setting and reaching your health goals from a weight-neutral perspective.  This program can be used by individuals, or by groups, including as a workplace wellness program!

Price: $25.00 ($10 for DancesWithFat members – register on the member page)
Click here for all the details and to register!

Body Love Obstacle Course

This e-course that includes coaching videos, a study guide, and an ebook with the tools you need to create a rock-solid relationship with your body. Our relationships with our bodies don’t happen in a vacuum, so just learning to see our beauty isn’t going to cut it. The world throws obstacles in our way – obstacles that aren’t our fault, but become our problem. Over the course of this program, Ragen Chastain, Jeanette DePatie, and six incredible guest coaches will teach you practical, realistic, proven strategies to go above, around, and through the obstacles that the world puts in front of you when it comes to living an amazing life in the body you have now.
Price: $99.00 Click here to register
($79.00 for DancesWithFat members – register on the member page)

Love It! 234 Inspirations And Activities to Help You Love Your Body
This is filled with thoughtful advice from the authors Jeanette DePatie, Ragen Chastain, and Pia Sciavo-Campo as well as dozens of other notable names from the body love movement, the book is lovingly illustrated with diverse drawings from size-positive artist Toni Tails.
Price: $9.99 softcover, $7.99 Kindle, ($6.95 + free shipping for DancesWithFat Members)

Book Me!  I’d love to speak to your organization. You can get more information here or just e-mail me at ragen at danceswithfat dot org!

I’m (still!) training for an Iron-distance triathlon! You can follow my journey at www.IronFat.com .

If you are uncomfortable with my offering things for sale on this site, you are invited to check out this post.

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